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It’s Neat to Meet‚Ķ Frank

Oh no!¬† The moment I’ve been dreading‚Ķ interviewing the officemate.¬† Duhn-duhn-duhn.¬† It’s so weird interviewing my buddy.¬† I mean, I know this guy!¬† When he writes in a group birthday card, ‚“Mary Ann, my wonderful roommate, have a great birthday.¬† See you back at our office‚Ķ Frank”, what else is there to say??¬† Here’s what‚Ķ

ML: ‘Sup.

FP: ‘Sup.

(This is where our conversation usually ends)

ML: So what’s your favorite color?

FP: Red and black.

ML: I said color, not colors.

FP: I think of it as one color.

ML (eye roll): Favorite movie?

FP: City of God.

ML: Ooooh, interesting choice.  Favorite song?

FP: I don’t have one.¬† I kill whatever song I like.¬† I listen to it over and over until I kill it.

ML: Are you, are you coming to the tree?

FP: No.  No, stop that!

ML (laughs): Okay, okay.¬† Let’s switch gears.¬† Tell me your dream destination or vacation spot.

FP: Anywhere with clear water, so I can go spearfishing.

ML: Other than spearfishing, what do you like to do in your spare time?

FP: I like to sit in front of the TV and watch 12 episodes of Mad Men.

ML: That’s it?¬†

FP: Yeah.

ML: That’s not it.¬† What about all the outdoorsy stuff you do?

FP: Yeah, but that’s not in my spare time.

ML (second eye roll): FRANK!  Okay, fine, what types of activities do you like to partake in outside when you have ample time on your hands?

FP: Rock climbing, race motocross (that’s ‚“dirt bike stuff” for us laymen) and backpacking ‚Äì parking the car and just going into the woods for two days.

ML: If you were stranded in the woods ala ‚“Bear Grylls”, what three things would you bring?

FP: A machete, something to start a fire with - I can’t do it without a tool, and‚Ķ can I bring my cell phone?¬† If I bring my phone, I can call for help and not have to be in the woods anymore.

ML: Yeah, yeah, yeah ‚Äì bring your phone.¬† What do you mean, you ‚“can’t”?¬† I’ve never heard you say that before.¬† You’re the most capable person I know! ¬†¬†¬†¬†

FP: Well, it’s not that I can’t do it.¬† I just haven’t tried yet.

ML: That makes more sense.¬† So Mr. Capable, what’s your biggest challenge on set?

FP: I don’t look at them as challenges ‚Äì just things that need to be done.

ML: Good answer.  So give me an example of a time when you had to save the day, at least.

FP: Once we only had two products to shoot with and the prototypes weren’t working properly on set.¬† I took both of them apart to make one functioning prototype that lasted the entire shoot.

ML: Nice save! ¬†So although you are now our prop master and you're starting to produce, what do you think you want to be ‚“when you grow up”?

FP: I like directing.

ML: If directing doesn’t work out and you could¬†theoretically¬†be a super hero instead, what super power would you possess?

FP: Flying.¬† Well, wait.¬† Do you fly at the same speed you walk? ¬†If that's the case, no. ¬†Do you get tired after flying?¬† If that’s the case, no. ¬†I'll just read people’s minds.

ML (smiles): As a mere mortal, is there anything spectacular on your bucket list?

FP: Jump out of an airplane by myself with a wingsuit.

ML: No guts, no glory, right?¬† Having said that, what’s your biggest regret?

FP: I don’t have any. ¬†Everything has a path and everything happens because it was supposed to.

ML: If you were supposed to win a million dollars, what would you do with it?

FP: Invest it, so it turns into more money and then figure it out from there.¬† There’s this quote by Lao Tzu, ‚“If you are depressed, you are living in the past.¬† If you are anxious, you are living in the future.¬† If you are at peace, you are living in the present.”

ML: Well, presently you are in the process of buying your first house.  When you are all settled and ready to host a dinner party, who would ideally be on your guest list – alive or dead, real or fake?

FP: I would invite you, Mary Ann (Oh, Frankie!), John Paul Jones - the American Revolution captain, not the guy from Led Zeppelin, although I like him, too.¬† My grandpa on my mom’s side and my grandma on my dad’s side who both died before I was born.¬† The cast of Fantastic Four, Summer from The O.C. and Don Draper from Mad Men, although he hates dinner parties.

ML: Can’t wait for the invite.¬† Anything else we should know?

FP: Yeah, don’t underestimate me.

ML: Word.

FP: Word.


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